Bhushan Raj Selvaraj

This is a random thought that came up on my mind while I was on the train.

Imagine yourself as an experienced sailor who has sailed around the world several times through the roughest seas and storms. You have so much experience and skills that you believe you can get out of any situation. There is no insurpassable ocean and storms. But would such a skillful sailor purposefully sail into the eye of the storm in the ocean? What would you do?

I imagined myself being in this scenario during a train ride (obviously I didn’t have enough charge in my phone to doomscroll). My answer is “No”. A legendary sailor will not go into harm’s way just for the fun of it. This does not mean the lack of belief in himself but because he is smart enough to not risk the lives of people who trust him with their lives. If he is forced to be in that situation, he will be able to sail through the storm (or around it? not sure what sailors do!). If you think in terms of evolution or by theory of probability, there is a very less chance for a confident-but-stupid sailor to survive difficult missions by just being confident and not having the skill. An experienced-skillful sailor will assess the situation and take calculated risks when necessary. There is a bit of arrogance in this but with deep consideration for the survival of the people in the boat and the mission.

A wise one will not rock a boat to show off. They do not need the validation of people to appreciate their skills and knowledge gained over several years of sailing. It is rather shown in how efficiently they maneuver through even the calm seas but are prepared to face the challenges of the ocean. A good car driver is not the one who can drive fast cutting through the lanes, but the one who makes the ride feel jerkless with smooth acceleration and braking. The same driver would be able to drive fast and through the heaviest traffic if required for saving someone’s life.

I heard this sentence in a TV interview of James Talerico recently: “True strength is in vulnerability”. There can be different ways of interpreting this sentence. I understand ‘vulnerability” in two ways: 1) knowing what you know and don’t know and 2) empathize with people who trust and follow your leadership. In all our lives, we are in a position that influences other people. It could a family, a team, a company or a country or even the future generations of the world. A strong leader would also feel vulnerable. Not for themselves but for people they lead.

A bully thinks only about himself and satisfying his own ego. He may rock the boat just for the heck of it because he thinks he can do whatever he wants. He trusts his skills so much that he forgets he has been riding the wave of luck or has made his past failures look less bad to others’ eyes. The bully does not think about the effects on other people or even the hype men around him. Everything they do is just to satisfy themselves.

According to my sailor analogy, a wise and strong person will not be a bully. Because strength is through vulnerability which requires one to be wise enough to know the limits of their skill and empathetic to enough to not put other people in harm’s way. You may have all the materialistic tools of strength, but if you lack the knowledge to use it with empathy you are not strong. The ones who survive and make long-lasting impact are the ones who learn continuously and have the humanity to empathize.

P.S: This thought was more profound when it was on my mind. I am not sure if I am able to put them in words properly. You may not think about it in the same way as I intended it to be. May be some day, I will be able to convey it better.